whine. whine. whine.

A girl I know was accepted to grad school. And I know she deserves it, which makes me want to punch myself in the face. Hard. Here I'd been telling myself I didn't want to go to grad school and yet, simultaneously, not really planning on doing anything else. Did I secretly want to reach a point where the couch was grooved to fit only me? Or am I afraid of actually getting in and finding out that all that slacking off I did in undergraduate school will make it impossible for me to do anything but fail? Who knows? Not me.